Hey All!

Apologies for sending a 'multi' email to you, but everyone has been so great about sending a concerned or cheerful email now and again,( particularly my old Brookfield Ohio friends)-- I'd be here until next Tuesday typing! So since both Jeanne and I are crashed out with miserable head colds, home from church and doing some computer clean up, I thought this would be a very good time to say hello and thank you.

Many of you are aware of my nearly two year war with cancer (upper throat) and the surgery, radiation and chemotherapy battles. At a check up last summer, the doctor says, "How do you feel?" I felt fine. But, he went on to tell me that now, after a year of successful (but hellish) recovery, I now had two additional cancer tumors that came back on my larynx/ voice box. They told me it would be best to have my voice box cut out. But cheerily told me I would have one of those voice 'buzz boxes' to use, they assured (oh boy), but it would save my life. They hoped. No guarantees. As usual. Otherwise, the Mayo had one alternate treatment of a strong double chemo which would rack me pretty good for months. I could do it just as well back at home at the local hospital, so I did. I consider myself a fairly tough guy, but every three weeks this stuff had me curled up in a ball nearly in tears. Jeanne was an angel with her help. How I managed to go to work on the tug and do my Longshore work on the docks last fall is beyond me now.

Well, to make a long story short, it worked. In fact, not just worked, but stunningly so! Totally and completely -- the tumors disappeared!  My voice was back strongly and I was eating & swallowing much better.  Blender meals are no fun.  I could even sing again! OK, not well you guys, but better. Think what you will, but I am convinced that the huge amount of prayer by friends, family (and people I'm sure I don't even know) is the reason.

Understand, this just doesn't normally happen in Stage IV Head & Neck cancers. The doctors put on a hopeful face, but really didn't expect but maybe a slow down of the growths. In fact, when the doctor came in to tell us the results, she was obviously uncomfortable -- and I thought "Oh, great -- I'm done..." But instead, she told us in a perplexed manner that they can't find anything on the scans!  Indeed, almost troubled by this great development!  So the Doc's had no explanation for the complete disappearance -- but Jeanne and I know. I tell ya, if you want to get closer to your faith - get cancer (or any serious crisis). And I 'm not saying that flippantly, you will see how God's works become very real in your life situation as you pray and get closer to Him. It's never too late to re-discover your faith. OK, enuf preaching from me (Can you see Ed as a preacher!? It's ok to laugh...I do, too!)

So, now we think things are fine and we go for a check up scan in early December at a Duluth local hospital -- and we get devastating news that the cancer has come back with a vengeance. This is news even my closest family has not heard until right now, by the way (sorry folks, sis, etc). But we were just crushed and couldn't talk to anyone, making for the beginning of a miserable Christmas season. The doctors said the scan showed the cancer returning in now THREE different areas around my throat & mouth. They essentially said, there isn't much more they can do, but they could try some experimental things (oh boy). It might be best to get my affairs in order, was the message.  I was crushed and then furious, as was Jeanne. We talked about it and decided to get a second opinion back at the Mayo. After all, this was my life in the balance.

So we head back down to Rochester, Jeanne driving and I'm in a fog. Here I am, barely 50, replaying my life in my head. What have I accomplished, was it enough? What more could I do with the possibly short time I have? What do I need to do? I remember praying and mentally picking out my funeral service's songs and pallbearers. For a good downer sometime, think about doing that.

We go into the Mayo Doctor's office after that morning's PET scan and he comes in with a serious look and is obviously concerned. His first question, "How do you feel?" (great, that question again). I say otherwise than being an emotional wreck, actually physically, pretty good...why? Well, he says -- we can't find anything. What!?, I nearly yelled.  I pretty much jumped up -- stunned..then mad. "What the hell you talking about!?  I'm supposed to have loads of cancer!"  (It seems a little humorous now, but not at the time). He says, "I'm telling you, there is nothing there...here I'll show you on the scans for yourself..." Indeed, he did -- we made him do it twice -- and he was right, there was nothing. Then he confirmed it with his own eyes, with a camera scope. Nothing. "Go home, live your life, forget about this unfortunate mix-up for awhile..." A bad PET scan read! "Mix-up"!? Whew.....

Wow. We got back out to the car in the parking ramp and couldn't even talk -- just both broke down and bawled like a couple of tripped two year olds. It was cold and raining, but the most beautiful day in my memory. So we went home December 20th, a few days before Christmas, to the most wonderful Holiday season in memory -- that had looked to be the worst ever! Yea, with the raw nerves of it all, I admit my soft side came out in gushes (OK, but I bet I can still out-sprint you Mark Franklin & Greg Ferrara!).

Anyway, friend, please know I am fine now. Well, rather, 'for now' I suppose.  Your never "cured" with this sneaky thing, no matter what they say. In fact, if you didn't know it, you have cancer...right now. We all do. It's just whether those cells take hold and try to kill you. Depends on the strength of your immune system to fight it off everyday -- and it gets weaker every year we get older (your over 50 now, too, right?). The only prevention is to lose weight, exercise to keep your system pumped up, eat the fruits & veggies and get the 8+ hours of sleep (Can you see junk food Ed as a Nutritionist? Go ahead, laugh again :)  )  I never smoked or was a boozer (the leading causes), but I got it because I got fat, a little lazy and stressed with a lousy diet (my opinion).  With all I've been through, some have said I should write about it..hmm..maybe I will (can you see Ed as an Author!? The guy who got thrown out of english class? Hoo-boy!)

On the bright side, we are moving ahead, continuing with our business expansion and marina / retail development 'Connor's Point Marine Center'. It will be a gem on the local waterfront and a destination for many with it's docks, shops and food court. I'll include a couple pics if I can do it (<<--Low Tech guy in a High Tech world). We believe these positive incidents with my health are God's 'green light' to go ahead, so were are not delaying again.  Spending a load of money, granted, but the results will be terrific -- and He won't be forgotten or obscured in it. Like I told Jeanne: "If you think I was on fire before -- watch me now!"

Reflecting a little, I think the emotional toll cancer or any debilitating disease or serious incident is so much greater than the physical pain of it. If you know someone who's having a tough time of it, pick up the phone just to say hi. Send a short note or card - how long's it really take -- 2 minutes with a stamp? Even an email is a mood lifter. I've said it before, elderly or young, it makes a lousy week a much better one to see that an old friend, new friend or acquaintance actually took the time to think about you. That someone actually took a minute to give a damn. It will make a huge impact on their life -- and that's one true guarantee!

Meanwhile, give me a call sometime or email me your number if I don't have it. Lets stay in touch. Heck, come up for a visit! With the building project, we are sometimes out of the office or I'm on one of the Pilot or Tug boats, so Sunday afternoons or most any morning is best -- I'd love to hear from or call you!  Once again, thank you very much for your friendship, love and prayers......

Sincerely,

Ed M.